Dear Dharma,

I travel frequently for work. Due to the nature of my job I often attend conferences and conventions where I am required to stay at a hotel. My company covers the cost of travel though I often have to share a room with another female co-worker for budgeting purposes.

This has never been a problem… until recently. My boss’s daughter came to work for the company and I am often traveling, and staying, with her. She is a nightmare! On every trip (6 so far), she has brought a man back to the room and I have been booted out into the hall until they are finished their business. The last time she did this I refused to leave. She brought the man in anyways and they had sex while I was in the room!

My company is too small to have an HR department and my boss just happens to own the company. I don’t have an avenue to open a complaint and I simply can’t afford to get my own hotel room. I love my job but this is ridiculous and unbelievably AWKWARD!

Please help!

Seriously Sleepless

Dear Seriously,

I have started and stopped like 5 times in trying to answer this – unbelievably awkward doesn’t even begin to touch this scenario! I really think I would turn to stone and die if someone, strangers!, were having sex 3 feet away from me.

What is wrong with this girl? And did the guy know you were there? I know we all like to play like guys wouldn’t have a problem with this, but honestly, I don’t think I know any man who would be okay with this, unless he thought you might join in.

You don’t say if you have tried talking to her, but if not, you need to be super direct in addressing her. She needs to understand that this is a professional situation and that her actions are completely unacceptable. If everyone had their own room, then what and who she chooses to do is her business but seeing how this isn’t the case, she needs a lesson in… in so many things!

Kicking you out is downright rude and disrespectful, so don’t let her do that again, even though the alternative is nauseating. It just gives this spoiled brat license to continue with her ridiculous behaviour. If she tries bringing a guy in, what if you turned the tables, and made it unbelievably awkward for them? If you have the stomach to stay in the room while they go at it, I have to believe you’ve got the grit to issue a counter attack of some kind. Turn the lights on, start up a conversation, act a little crazy, poke them. That’s got to be a mood killer, non?

Also, you say you love your job so it’s likely you are really good at it. I’m sure the company would be sorry to lose you. Maybe if she thought there was a possibility you would go to your boss – her parent – with this information, it might make her go to the guy’s room instead?

I guess the problem with a threat is that you would have to be prepared to follow up with it should the threat itself not have the desired effect. And you know what? As a last resort, I’m not sure that’s the worst thing. Without going into detail, what if you went to your boss and said that sharing a room with someone who has severely different habits than you has made it so you are unable to sleep, and it’s affecting the quality of your work. You never know – they might already suspect their offspring is a douche and be willing to make different arrangements in order to keep you happily employed and sleeping through the night.



  • Trudie says:

    First of all…. BARF! That is way beyond inconsiderate and nasty! If that is the attitude of this person, I am curious as to how seriously the business itself it being taken? This person is out there representing the company with no respect for anyone it would seem. I would be speaking with the boss for sure! Or, you could always video some embarrassing portion and use it as blackmail…….that’s always fun.

    • Krystal says:

      HA! Video some, now that would for sure get her attention.. I hope.. What this woman is doing is SO wrong! How uncomfortable would it be for her in the workplace after the fact, if the boss found out… I say confront her and if she gives you attitude and continues to do it (literally) then tell the boss!

Whether you agree with Dharma or think she missed the mark on this one, leave a Comment!

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