Horrible Bosses 3


Dear Dharma, 

I know there are lots of horrible boss stories out there, but I need to share another one with you.

I have been at my job for almost 4 years, and have gradually gained responsibilities and perks.  My boss doesn’t recognize any of my expanded roles in the company, and persists in treating me like a personal assistant.  Any comments he makes are more likely to be about how unqualified I am and how I lucked into this position, never the least complimentary or appreciative.

It was marginally ok when I was new, and didn’t have a lot else going on, but now I have a full plate without picking up his dry-cleaning and making reservations for personal dates.  My work has to be set aside to go get his mom a birthday gift! While he is off getting a haircut or playing Solitaire on his computer!

I am more than a little annoyed!  How do I get the point across that I am not his personal assistant, and in fact am a valuable and productive employee?  When do I say “enough” and find something else?

Mr. Big Boss Man

Dear Mr. Big,

It sounds like this is an environment where growth is not necessarily encouraged, but it seems like you have found a way to expand your position and grow in spite of that, which will always look good on your resume.

It is so often the case in positions like this that a lot of time gets spent coddling egos – mostly these guys don’t get to be Big Boss Man without their giant sized ego taking up most of the space, right?  And that’s what it sounds like you are dealing with here.  Likely that is not going to change.  Or rather, any change that occurs is going to come from your side of the desk, not his.

Your question is how do you get the point across that you’re not his personal assistant?  You don’t.  Cuz he won’t hear you, and he doesn’t care.  You know he actually knows this already, right?  That information is not going to be what curtails his behaviour.

Your question is when is enough enough?  I would say once you have exhausted all potential to learn anything else from this position.  Once you’ve reached that point, there is no longer any reason to justify staying in a job where you are unappreciated and constantly being cut down.

Sadly, ‘unappreciated’ is a common status in the workplace, but to have someone tell you how unqualified you are on a regular basis, especially after being in the position for several years… That’s just designed to be hurtful.  I mean, if you suck so bad, why haven’t they fired your sorry butt?

I’m going to go out on a limb and say you might just be ready to call it quits and find yourself something better, thus your letter to Dear Dharma, non?

So now what, you ask?

Start putting it out to the universe!  Work on getting your resume up to date, register with a few agencies and head hunters in your area, and start making some connections.  The more open you are to other opportunities, the more likely they will start to come your way.

What’s the saying – the best time to find a job is when you already have one?

Good luck, and please do let us know how it goes!



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1 Comment

  • Patricia says:

    He sounds like a real jerk!!! I agree with Dharma, I would totally find a new job and quit! You are a saint for putting up with that for so long, I know I could not do that.. Someone treating you like that is not worth your time and effort!!

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