Hell’s Kitchen


Dear Dharma,

I work in the tourism industry in a very busy city and I’m struggling with finding solutions to an issue I’m having with my employer.

1) It’s heading into the busy season and he’s never here.  He says he works from home, but since he doesn’t have access to our system from there, what he’s really doing is sending me emails asking me to check things for him.  This adds to my already busy workload.

2) When he’s in the office, he is absolutely miserable to the clients we deal with and that’s if he decides to deal with them at all.  Normally, if I tell him somebody would like to speak with him, he sighs loudly and says, “What?!” quite angrily.  If there is an upset client, he passes them off to me almost immediately.  Meanwhile, I get to make little to no decisions about how our business is run so I’m stuck with people shouting at me without any control on making effective changes.

3) While it isn’t always about the money, if it wasn’t at least a little bit about the money I’d probably be living in a communist compound living off the land and singing campfire songs by night.  He makes at least twice as much money as I do, refuses to deal with clients and isn’t in the office 60% of the time.

Now, I’m no slouch especially about business, I’ve attempted to discuss at least some of this with him – but he will go off about how long he’s been in the business and that he deserves a break, or deserves not to deal with clients.

We are a customer service industry are we not?  Plus, since when does anybody earn the right to be an asshole?

Please help Dharma, what do I do?


I Work For Gordon Ramsey

Dear Working for Gordon,

Oooh!  I want to live in a compound and sing campfire songs by night!

Working with a one-sided boss named Gord can be frustrating for sure, and it’s doubly annoying when it makes doing your own job more difficult.

And of course you know Dharma is going to tell you that changing how you handle things is the only thing you have control over… so if you choose to continue working in this environment, you are going to have to change the way you process your surroundings, since it sounds like any attempts to work it out with Gord-o have gone unheard.  Isn’t that always the way…

Although it creates a bit more work for you, try looking at it as a bonus when he’s not in the office.  Because him not being there effectively eliminates your second problem, non?  If he’s not there, he can’t be miserable to those pesky customers, now can he…

In regards to how much money he makes, that’s just something you need to put out of your head.  Bosses always make more than employees, that’s just the way of the world.  Doesn’t necessarily mean they are doing much to earn that salary, but again, the amount of time you put into agonizing over that detail, the worse off you are, not him.  When you’re the boss, you’ll make more money than the little guy too.

You know, I could go on with more suggestions like this (see Not the Great Pretender), but really, I need to ask – do you even want to continue working there?  I looked back at your question, and there wasn’t a positive note to be sung.

Do you think perhaps it’s time to start looking for something else?  The tourism industry in a very busy city… I don’t know, but it sounds like there should be other jobs out there that would be more fulfilling and less aggravating?

Bottom line – Gordon isn’t going to change.  Gords never change.  So whatever happens next is completely up to you.

Would love to hear how this all works out, so feel free to drop Dharma and her readers a line to let us know how things are going!



Got a question for Dharma? She’s probably got an answer!

Go on, submit your question in the contact form on the toolbar. You know you want to! To submit anonymously, just make up a fake name and email – as long as the fields are populated, it works!

And be sure to follow Dharma everywhere! https://www.facebook.com/askdeardharma

Instagram too! https://www.instagram.com/dear_dharma/

And of course, Twitter… @deardharma

1 Comment

  • Taking Charge says:

    I would start calling the shots and making decisions. If the boss objects, tell him it was a matter that needed handling and he was not available for the customer to handle it so you made a decision in the best interest of the business and the client. If the boss becomes irate, which is inevitable, then he will have to show more accountability.

Whether you agree with Dharma or think she missed the mark on this one, leave a Comment!

%d bloggers like this: