Blind Date

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Dear Dharma,

My best friend wants to set me up on a blind date! I reluctantly agreed after she continued to pester me.

Do you have any tips? I have never been on one before and I haven’t really dated much.

What if he’s not attractive and we have nothing to talk about… or worse… chews with his mouth open?

Cold Feet

Dear Feet,

Hmmm.  Right out the gate, the “reluctant” part bothers me… because if you are going in reluctantly, then it kind of becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy based on negative energy, non?

Between now and the date, is there any way we could turn that around?  I know you are asking for tips for when you are on the actual date, but I think the attitude you take into the experience is more likely to be what makes or breaks it.

Let’s look at this as an opportunity no matter how it turns out.  An opportunity to get a bit dressed up, to try out a new coffee shop or restaurant you’ve never been to.  An opportunity to meet another human being who shares this earth with you and to learn a little bit about them… And worst case scenario, the opportunity to tell your friends the best worst date story ever.

Main thing is you won’t die if it’s a terrible experience, and going in with a bright and open attitude can make all the difference.  Remember, he’s probably nervous too, so doing your best to make things go smoothly is in everyone’s best interest.

As for the date itself – take a quick read over the first installment of Tinder Tales for some do’s and don’ts, including the comments… some good stuff.

On top of the obvious be on time, be respectful etc., have some topics up your sleeve in case the conversation lags.  Get caught up on some current events, know some of the local happenings in your area.

Ask the friend who is setting you up for the 411 as to his likes and dislikes, so that you can be all “Hey, I understand you are really into blah blah blah!  That sounds interesting, tell me more!”

All of this will help take care of the “what if we have nothing to talk about?” part.  As far as how attractive he is or isn’t, ask your friend for a picture, or creep him on FB. That way you’ll have some idea what he looks like.  And remember the whole book cover no judging thing…

The chewing with mouth open part, well…maybe just don’t go for spaghetti.

Good luck and would love to hear how it goes!

Dharma

 

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6 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    I agree 100% with Dharma on this one! Look at it as a positive thing and a way to meet someone who you may or may not like. No biggie!

  • Anonymous says:

    I agree with Dharma as well, especially about the new restaurant, coffee shop etc. When I was first doing the blind date thing and was very nervous a friend told me to start planning to go places that I found really fun or wanted to try.

    It took a lot of pressure off of me and him as well. Plus, even if it was a dud date we still got to do something fun

  • Irene McGuinness says:

    Love this. Bin dere dun dat. Your advice is spot on!

Whether you agree with Dharma or think she missed the mark on this one, leave a Comment!

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