The Best of Dharma – Halloween Hoochie


Hello everyone – while Dharma is away on vacay, this is a great time to look back at some of the fun posts we’ve had in days gone by… And here’s a timely one, being Halloween and all… 🙂

Dear Dharma, 

Here is a timely one, with Halloween coming and all the partying and such that goes on.  My girlfriend and I are pretty social, it is one of the things that we have in common.  We always go out to a big Halloween bash, with drinking and dancing, and both like to have a good time.  One thing that I am starting to not like though are her costumes.  She always seems to come up with a racy or risqué costume, which normally I am fine with.  Who doesn’t like the sexy policewoman, right?

However, in the past couple of years it seems like her choices have crossed the line into full on slutty.  She has a great body (IMHO) and has never been a wallflower, but I am uncomfortable with the amount of cleavage on display (occasionally on both ends!).  No more sexy nurse, now it’s Nikki Minaj, only trampier.

Do I have a say in her costume choice?  Am I even right to make a big deal about it?  Maybe I am the one getting more conservative?

Too Young to be a Curmudgeon!

Dear Curmudgeon,

Trampier than Nikki Minaj?  Wow, that’s impressive!

You say she’s always had a racy and risqué side and that she’s never been a wallflower, so on that front, you kind of knew what you signed up for.  However, if you think she’s bordering on inappropriate, then I say yes, it’s okay for you to speak up – something along the lines of “Wow, honey, you look great!  I’m wondering though, if it’s a little too much?”

So in that way, you can have a say, but are you right to make a big deal out of it?  Sure, if you don’t mind going solo to the party.  You can’t dictate what she can and can’t wear, and I expect if you tried to, your little exhibitionist is going to tell you to pound sand.

Perhaps over time you have become more conservative, and that’s okay, it’s called life, it’s ever changing.  Maybe try acknowledging that to her, should she be intent on going forward with the intended cleavage show.  If you said, heart in hand, that you respect her right to attend the party in whatever state of (un)dress she chooses, but for whatever reason, her current choice makes you uncomfortable.

That might be enough for her to consider making a different decision – but if not, I wouldn’t die on this hill.  Just be happy she’s still got it going on. In the words of Dr. Hook, when you’re in love with a beautiful woman, it’s hard…


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  • Allen K says:

    if we’re giving musical advice, how about “if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife so from my personal point of view get an ugly girl to marry you.”

  • DeSean says:

    havent you seen Mean Girls? “Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it” ?

  • some dude says:

    Back it down a bit son! It’s Halloween, the time for letting it all hang out! instead of being Senor Buzzkill, be supportive and happy she is a beautiful confidant woman! Maybe she is showing it off all over town, but she is still going home with you right? just chill, and be all “that’s right, she’s with me” and let’em drool.

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