The Best of Dharma – Playing the Trump Card


Hello there everyone – thought this was a fitting one to re-visit in light of tomorrow’s election.  Fingers crossed… fingers crossed…

Dear Dharma, 

I don’t know if you follow US politics, but the current election campaigns here are pretty much at the level of cheesy comedy, except it isn’t really funny.

I have never been all that interested in politics, but have always voted.  I’ve always tried to be rational about it and not just stick to the same party.  My husband is more or less the same, but this time he seems to have gone way overboard.

He has had a rough few years work wise, his company did some downsizing and now he is a “contractor” who does the same job as before, but for less money and no benefits.  He has decided that Mr. Trump is amazing, and has all the answers and that voting for him will fix everything.

Not just that, but he has decided that he needs to help out by volunteering, and has made several donations (not small ones either).  I am really wondering what has happened to the man I married, and if this is a side that I just never saw before, because he ignores the blatant racism and just plain mean spiritedness of the campaign.

It is making me wonder how we can make it through this! Help me figure out how to open my husband’s eyes, or at least help me hide my own eyes, until this mess is over!

If it Walks like a Duck and Quacks like a Duck, is it The Donald?

Dear Duck,

“I will build a great wall – and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me – and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words.”

“You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young, and beautiful, piece of ass.”

“If I were running ‘The View’, I’d fire Rosie O’Donnell. I mean, I’d look at her right in that fat, ugly face of hers, I’d say ‘Rosie, you’re fired.”

– Donald Trump

You can google Donald Trump all day long to keep yourself both horrified and entertained.  These are just a few of his quotes that do a great job of capturing the essence.

When we look up to someone, when we support someone with both our time and money, it’s because we admire what they stand for.  And if we admire a person, it’s usually because we connect with their characteristics and viewpoints on an emotional level.

When your husband gets behind the Trump campaign with both his time and the family money, the easy conclusion to jump to is that he admires a racist, womanizing, mean spirited bullying pig.

Which could lead you to say that if you think Trump is the guy you want leading an entire country, and a fairly big one at that, then you obviously support and connect with his value system.

And if you support and connect with someone’s value system, is that because those values work for you?

What’s the best option?

I don’t know if I think hiding your eyes is the best option here.  I mean, I guess you’re hoping the Duck doesn’t win and this subject will just go away… but does it not still leave a residue on the man you are married to?

I think some gentle conversation is in order. Ask your husband some questions that challenge his new found bromance… like, doesn’t it bother you when Trump says this, or when Trump does that? Do you really agree with him when he says (oh man, just fill in the blank with whatever, preferably something vile) and is this something you can really get behind? Probe into what kind of example he feels Trump is setting for the youth of America.  Frick, the world in general.

If you can have a calm-ish conversation around this and he gives you his rationale, maybe you will be able to better understand and better stomach this sudden change.

If not, then you may have to look into some other options of what to do when a couple is no longer on the same page when it comes to their value system.  In my opinion, that’s a pretty big thing to not agree on, so don’t let the Donald Trump disguise fool you.



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Categories: Advice, conflict, Politics


  • Quack Quack says:

    Seriously Dharma, this gal had to know who she was marrying years back. Those latent beliefs and characteristics don’t just appear. Yikes…!! And he even donated to the campaign!! You were more than kind with your advice.

  • More to the story says:

    It’s sad to see that Trump could actually break a family apart. Think about it. This man is probably hurt by his current situation like many others. Found someone willing to revenge immigrants and women for that. He might be so mad and hurt that can’t see the man for what it is.

Whether you agree with Dharma or think she missed the mark on this one, leave a Comment!

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