Not… Scared Enough?



Dear Dharma,

I had a friend tell me in a conversation about how her husband had disappointed her a few weeks ago by choosing to do a work related activity rather than blow it off to do something with her.  In her words, he was more scared of his boss than he was of her, and she didn’t like that.

Should I put this down to minor frustration on her part, or is it a sign of maybe deeper issues?  Does she really think having a scared husband is a good thing?

Is it just better to mind my own business?

Nosy or Not?

Dear Nosy,

So, I have to ask – did you feel more than a little sorry for the brow beaten husband in this scenario?

I do, and I don’t even know these people!

Anyway – to deal strictly with your question, yes.  I’d stay about as far away from that scene as possible.

I don’t know how close you are, but unless you are BFF’s, I can guarantee your feedback won’t be welcome.  We only need to look at the type of woman who wants her husband to shudder in fear when she enters the room to know that, right?

Perhaps if the situation ever allows for you to lead by example, you could say things like, “Aren’t so and so a wonderful couple?  They really seem to respect each other and have this loving, equal partnership.  You know, where no one is cowering while the other is powering…”

Okay, maybe skip that last part if you want to soften it up a little, but you catch my drift.

And here’s the thing – even the most timid eventually figure out how to chew their way free and bolt into the night, so hopefully they can level things out before it gets to that point.

Nonetheless, stay out of it unless it becomes unbearable to watch, and then weigh the risks at that time.



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1 Comment

  • Nicky says:

    Scary lady! Plus she didn’t seem to consider that her husband simply wanted to get his work done instead of doing whatever she had suggested. Maybe he had a deadline! In any case, I hope the fella is strong enough to handle this woman’s personality. Hopefully he knew what he was getting into when they got married! Haha!

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