Blowing in the Breeze



Dear Dharma,

I love your posts, keep ’em coming!

I’m one of those people that will always let someone know, even a stranger, that they have a pocket unzipped on their backpack or such. I’ll even chase someone down to let them know!

The other day I was walking down the street at lunchtime and couldn’t help but notice that the woman in front of me had a small opening in the seam of her pants….i.e. on her bum.

She was with two other women, but in their defence she was walking a bit behind them, so maybe they hadn’t seen it. The split wasn’t glaring, but it was noticeable from 5 feet away. I was so torn if I should let her know or not!

Telling someone to zip up their bag is one thing, but letting them know they have a hole in their pants in an awkward spot??? That seemed to me like it would have just been mean to let her know, since really, what would she be able to do about it at lunchtime?

So, my question is: should I have let her know? Or let one of her friends know so they could tell her at the end of the day and she could repair the pants that night?

So Torn!

Dear Torn,

Let’s do it this way – would you want to walk around all day with your ass hanging out?

I sure wouldn’t… no matter how embarrassing it would be to have a total stranger bring it to my attention, it wouldn’t match how I would feel knowing my ass had been blowing in the wind all day long and no one told me!

So if you are the type of person who has no problem alerting others to unzipped backpacks (and kudos to you for that, by the way!), then butts in the breeze easily falls into the same category.

Perhaps one of her friends has an extra-long sweater she can borrow back at the office.  Or perhaps a reason to do some emergency shopping.  Either way, alerting her to the situation would be an act of compassion and not at all meant to be mean.



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