Fade to Grey



Dear Dharma,

This may be such a small thing but it really annoyed me. You are the person for everything though, big or little! I love your advice.

I was at the grocery store the other day and I was loading my stuff at the cashier. The person in line behind me kept ramming their cart into me. She didn’t apologize and did it multiple times. I even stared right at her when she did it and she said nothing.

It would be different if there was a kid there… maybe I would be more forgiving. A grown woman, jamming her cart into me multiple times without saying a word – I wanted to snap at her! You can obviously feel when you bump into something or SOMEONE. Either she is ignoring it or she doesn’t know?

I kept my cool and didn’t say a word. What should I do in the future if this happens?

Blind Sided

Dear Blind Sided,

I had a friend once who referred to himself as being “grey” – as in, he often wondered if sometimes he just faded to grey, turning all but invisible, allowing people to ram their carts into him without the slightest acknowledgement.

Maybe you went grey that day.

This would be one of those situations where Dharma recommends the smile and apologize approach.  Yes, smile and apologize.

Something like, “Oh my goodness, I’m sorry – was I in your way just now?”  Smile.

The apology isn’t genuine, and probably the smile isn’t either, but that’s alright – this technique simply serves as a way to call attention to what just happened without turning things nasty.

The desire to snap at her is understandable; it just won’t result in anything good.

Hopefully they acknowledge you and apologize – however, she could just as likely ignore you.  As long as the ramming stops though, meh, that’s all we’re gearing for, right?

However, should the behaviour continue, I think it’s perfectly okay to take a direct approach, something along the lines of, “Okay, no seriously, could you please be careful with your cart?  I’d like to go home with both my feet intact.”

But wait!  There’s more!!

Now that you’ve read Dharma’s answer, you need to go and check out Dave & Kat to see what they said about this exact same question!

Dharma, Dave & Kat are having a little fun together this week, so all Q & A’s will be addressed in both forums.

What did they have to say about this one – are they on the same page as Dharma?  You won’t know until you have a listen, so click here now!



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