Heart Shaped Third Wheel



Hello there and Happy Valentine’s Day!  Oddly, Dharma didn’t receive a single Valentine’s dilemma this year, which is great! Does that mean you’ve got it all sorted out? 🙂

So I thought we’d do a little re-cap from last year…

Dear Dharma,

So, it’s the night before Valentine’s Day. A co-worker of mine just told me that he’s started dating a friend of ours that I haven’t seen in ages. They’ve invited me out tonight but I can’t help but feel like a third wheel here.

She’s from out of town and he is from here, so their time is precious. I haven’t talked to her about this, but he says that she wants to see me and catch up.

Do I go?

Heart Shaped Third Wheel

Dear Heart Shaped,

Although this question came in when it wasn’t directly relevant to the calendar, I thought it still deserved an answer.  I’m thinking this situation could apply to so much more than just Valentine’s Day, non?

Unless you have some reason to think your co-worker friend was not being straight up with you, I really hope you go. They are under no obligation to spend an evening out with you, and I really have to believe that if they didn’t want to, they wouldn’t have reached out.

Do you think you are projecting your impressions of what Valentine’s Day (Eve) should be onto this couple, along with your thoughts as to how they should spend their time together?  I would like to think they know the time limitations on their relationship and still choose to spend some of it with other people – which actually sounds quite healthy to me!

Second guessing other people’s intentions can take the fun out of everything, and sometimes it’s best to take things at face value and just live in the moment.  Hopefully you seize the opportunity to get together with a friend you haven’t seen in a long time and enjoy your night out with them!  Great times with friends make up some of the best memories, right?

Would love to know if you go, so drop us a comment down below and keep us in the loop!



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